i'm

not happy, fucking grow up.

l

Wednesday night i decided i want to go red, Friday night i decided to go through with it.
i like it, hopefully will get me on track with getting closer to blonde~

im so fucked with uni work, i lay in bed stressing about it. I wanted this so bad and now i have zero motivation to do anything these days.

i thought i might add that i have an insane year six crush on two boys i know haha, its hilarious.
but its fun.

Hey unloving, I will love you.

Reading over my last posts makes me relise how much my life has changed in these few short months. My life has taken a complete 180 degree turn. I have freed myself from this monster that so unexpectedly came into my life and changed it. Being single rules. I have moved out of home, I'm independant and am studying what I love at univesity.
My mum is so close to being cancer free I can't even explain how happy I am. My fingers are always crossed.
My life consists off a breezy 13 hours of uni a week, partying Wednesday nights, spending time with my bestfriends and driving to Forster to see my family. I'm so proud of myself, I'm so happy.
I want to update this as much as possible!

update

wow, so i really haent updated my blogspot in a fair while so i though i might just let you in on whats been going on.
i spent 16 days in bali, instead of going to the gold coast for schoolies, bali seemed so much more appealing then spending 7 drunk days on the gold coast, although majority of our nights where spent drunk and sweaty.
i met some great people, got a tattoo, rode a scooter, almost got bashed, fit 9 people into a taxi, slept in another motel, had shots of arak which i will never, ever do again and had a holiday i dont think i can ever forget.

i broke up with my boyfriend, since then i have learnt SO much, even about my self. i learnt that others influence me alot, and now that i am single i feel like i have come back. I met someone who has shown me what i need, shown me how things should be, but its ended, and from the short time we spent together he has shown me alot.

i'm waiting to move out, we have told the tennents to move out of our townhouse so brad and me can move in, SO excited you dont even know!
i cant wait to have my own place. i really feel like i have grown up alot.

I am starting uni this year also, im really anxious about hearing back from newcastle university as i am hoping i got into the course i want to do! which is a bachelour of fine arts and teaching, so after 4 years i will be able to teach in a primary or secondary school, being 22-23 when i finish, i am so excited as i will still be young!

what else, ive moved to forster and ive been catching up with people that i used to go to kindergarten with, i love it here, i love my house, i love living on acres and waking up and seeing a wallaby out side your window, i love how its so peacful and i love having our family back, i love having family dinners together which we havent had in 6 years. i love having my mum and dad home all the time and not at work 24/7, i love that my mums getting better!

i am just so happy with everything that is going on, and i have so much planned until uni starts and i am just so grateful for everything in my life.
my new years resoultion is to put myself first, to not let others walk over me, remind myself that im important too. to save money and to continue to be the positive person i am.

saturday

i read ninas bulletin and i decided i would copy.
although i am going to write things i currently dislike.

+
waking up next to my lover tangled in each others arms, clean sheets, dark hair, white eye shadow, new makeup, cleanliness, my future, rock of love, americas next top model, warm nights, mixx cds, holding hands, my nigger buns, orange and mango, big kisses, being hopefull, having money, spending money, being lucky, winning on the pokies, being in love, having an amazing family, taking nothing for granded.

-
red lights, scene kids, people who walk slow, low battery, motorolla chargers, being pasty, sweating, feeling bloated, arguments, loosing money.

rant

girls these days get some self respect, my god.
just broadcast everything via myspace, especially your body through myspace photos.
i love how in her myspace photos she has her bra straps tightened as short as they go so her boobs look massive and sit right under her chin, or how her myspace photos show off her swim wear/under wear collection. as well as editing photos, smoothing out your skin, making your hair redder and your eyes bluer.
or how that girl, your not even pretty in real life and your hair is rank as, go get an education, stop scabbing off centerlink and get off myspace, shit!
seriously, and i have decided i really don't like/have time for those people who are under 18, bar 3.
/rant


oh and i seen a scene kid yesterday, i didnt think they exsisted anymore.
obviously not.